Communication
Talk, Talk, Talk. I talked to my baby at 15 months when he came into my life permanently and have kept that line of communication constant over the past 10 years. I knew he couldn’t understand what I was saying or respond in words at 15 months but it made a big difference when he could speak.
Here’s a great example. He was maybe 2 and with his babysitter. She told me this story in astonishment. He was trying to tell her something. She heard “passy fifer”. She asked him to repeat it because she still couldn’t understand what he was trying to say. She thought he was saying 2 simple words until it dawned on her that he was saying “Pacifier”. He was articulating a four-syllable word. Just talking to your children, not baby talk but actual words, strengthen their communication skills. Check out the article at Stanford News below.
Talking directly to toddlers strengthens their language skills, Stanford research shows
Now we talk constantly and I try to answer all his questions. He comes to me with problems at school, with his friends, and even his teachers. I’m able to work through the issues with him and the adults involved. We are “friends”. Until recently I thought I couldn’t be his friend but I had to be the parent. In writing this I’ve come to realize that we are friends. The dynamic is very different from his peers because there are boundaries. However, the fact that he can talk to me about anything and he wants to do that voluntarily and in turn, I do the same (to a point) constitutes a friendship in my opinion. He still respects my authority and follows my instructions. I know a lot of parents think they can’t be their child’s friend but you don’t have to choose one or the other. Also, why wouldn’t you want to have a relationship with your child where he talks to you about everything? Check out the article below by Joanne Stern Ph.D. at Psychology Today.
Scientific Evidence
There is scientific evidence that communicating with your baby contributes to their language development. It’s thought that being able to share attention with others at age 8 to 10 months is one of the greatest milestones in language development.
Theorists argue that the following aspects of communication are also important for cognitive and language development.
1. Eye gaze
2. Expressing emotion
3. Bids for attention
4. Reading
5. Playing with toys
More over it’s thought that parents who talk to their children, read to them and play aloud, have preschoolers and toddlers with greater language skills.
Google Scholar
Tips for Communicating With Your Teen
1. Listen
2. Validate their feelings
3. Show trust
4.Don’t be a dictator
5. Give praise
6. Control your emotions
7. Do things together
8. Share regular meals
9. Be observant
Tips on communicating with your teen – Child Mind Institute
They can be worse than a toddler and you have to be patient. I hope that the foundation I’ve built with my son today lasts into his teens. The mother-son bound we’ve built allows him to continue to come to me even with the difficult, embarrassing and especially scary stuff. That he feels he can open up to me in any circumstance and we work through the problem together.